Thou Fair Eliza (c) - Act 3, Scene 2 Addition

Today, I'd like to share my favorite addition to the script.  Act 3, Scene 2.  The garden party.  In My Fair Lady, the event was changed to a grand ball.  In the original Pygmalion, the event is referred to as a garden party.

Here, the goal was to show what Shaw only alluded to, and in particular, to lay the seeds for Eliza's choice to head to Mrs. Higgins house after the fight later that evening.  This should be the moment where Mrs. Higgins a glimpse into the depths of her son's narcissism, something she likely dismissed before.

In particular, there are a few lines in here that I could hear coming from the voices of actor's I would associate with the characters.

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SCENE 2.

[The garden party.  The garden is situated in such a way that upstage center there is a stair with a terrace landing overlooking the garden.  This balcony is being used like a stairway at a grand ball; everyone entering and exiting the party are using the stairwell.  

Down stage center, a section has been reserved for a dance floor, the patrons swirling around the floor as the party continues on.

Throughout the party, the footman will be announcing names offstage, after which, the guests will enter upstage center, take the stairs Stage Right to go down into the garden.  

Mrs. Higgins has previously arrived at the party and is on the landing, watching the events of the party unfold.]

FOOTMAN. [offstage]  Colonel George Mayhew Pickering.

[Colonel Pickering enters on the landing and acknowledges Mrs. Higgins.]

PICKERING. Mrs. Higgins.  So good to see you this fine evening.

MRS. HIGGINS.  And you, Colonel Pickering.  I trust my wayward son has not been treating you too terribly.

PICKERING.  Oh, no.  Quite the contrary.  I dare say these last few days have been some of the most rewarding of this entire process.

FOOTMAN. [offstage] Professor Henry Higgins.

[Higgins enters brusquely.]

PICKERING.  Speak of the devil.  Ah, Henry.  I see you’ve made it in one piece.

HIGGINS.   Yes, and no worse for wear.  Though I must say, you should have seen the dreadful row that occurred before we could head out the door.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Really, Henry.

HIGGINS.  Hello, mother.  I trust you are enjoying yourself this evening.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Certainly, though it sounds like I missed the highlight of this evening’s festivities.

HIGGINS.  No, no.  Just a misunderstanding.  She, of course, decided to pick tonight of all nights to become obstinate.

PICKERING.  Now Henry…

HIGGINS.  Don’t “now Henry” me, Pick.  She knows this is exactly what she has prepared for.  She has been to enough luncheons and afternoon teas.  Tonight is the real test.

MRS. HIGGINS. Why Henry, if I did not know any better, I would say you were concerned.

HIGGINS.  Of course I’m concerned…

FOOTMAN. [offstage] Professor Francios Nepean.

HIGGINS. And that is why.

[Professor Nepean enters, and passes the party by on the balcony.]

NEPEAN. Higgins [nodding]

HIGGINS. Nepean.

[The trio watches as Nepean descends the stairs and begins to work his way around the party.]

HIGGINS.  That vulture.  If Eliza slips even for a second, he’ll see right through her.

PICKERING. Henry, she will be fine.  She could not be any more prepared.

HIGGINS.  We shall see if that has proven enough.  Ee, gods, what other calamities will this night entail?

FOOTMAN. [offstage]  Mrs. Glennis Eynsford Hill, accompanied by Master Frederick Eynsford Hill and Miss Clara Eynsford Hill.

HIGGINS.  Of course.

[The Eynsford Hills enter and begin their introductions.]

MRS. EYNSFORD HILL.  Mrs. Higgins, what a pleasure.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Likewise, my dear.  I trust you have been getting along well since our last luncheon.

MRS. EYNSFORD HILL.  Oh, yes.  I hope Freddy has not been too much of a bother in the days since.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Not at all.  He is a splendid conversationalist.

MISS EYNSFORD HILL. [to Mrs. Eynsford Hill]  Mother, may I proceed down to the festivities below?  I want to begin rounding out my dance card as quickly as possible.

MRS. EYNSFORD HILL. Unaccompanied … - … I …

PICKERING. Mrs. Eynsford Hill, would you permit me to escort you and your daughter.  It would be a privilege

MRS. EYNSFORD HILL.  Yes, that would be wonderful.  Thank you, sir.  Come along, Clara.

FREDDY. [to Higgins] Will Miss Doolittle be attending this evening?  I do hope to see her.

HIGGINS.  She should be here by now.  I wonder what the devil could be keeping her.

FOOTMAN. [offstage]  Miss Eliza Doolittle.

[The pace of the scene slows tremendously as Eliza enters the scene.  All eyes immediately go to her.]

HIGGINS.  There you are.  It’s about time you made your entrance.  Now..

MRS. HIGGINS.  Henry!

FREDDY.  [to Eliza, fumbling over his words]  Miss Doolittle, … you look….  That is to say… Would you grant me the honor of this dance?

[Eliza nods and they both descend the stairway stage right and make their way to downstage center.   Leaving Mrs. Higgins and the Professor on the balcony.  Debussy’s Claire de Lune begins playing in the background.  All eyes continue to be on Eliza as she dances and makes her way around the room.  

After several moments.]

MRS. HIGGINS.  Henry, she’s radiant.

HIGGINS.  She is doing fairly well, isn’t she?  I dare say, this whole gambit make succeed after all.

MRS. HIGGINS.  It may well indeed, but that is not what I am referring to, Henry.  Surely her beauty cannot have escaped even your notice?

[Professor Nepean approaches Eliza.]

HIGGINS.  Mmmhmmm.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Henry [slightly exasperated] I fear this damned contest of yours has gone on long enough.  What is to be done with Eliza after this evening’s performance?

HIGGINS.  [barely listening] Done with what, Mother?

MRS. HIGGINS.  Eliza, Henry.  What will be done with Eliza?

HIGGINS.  Eliza seems to be doing splendidly.  I suppose we shall know soon enough.  Here comes Nepean.

[Nepean ascends the stairway stage left and approaches Higgins.]

NEPEAN.  Henry, you have truly found a star in your new pupil.  I would watch myself.  I dare say she may outshine us all.

[Nepean nods and exits.]

HIGGINS.  Did you hear that, Mother?  A triumph.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Yes, dear, but what does this mean for Eliza?

HIGGINS.  Mean?!?  It means I’ve done it.  I’ve taken a dirty little guttersnipe and turned her into the most genteel of ladies.  There is no limit to what she can do now.

MRS. HIGGINS.  [Resigned]  There is no getting through to you, is there?

HIGGINS.  Yes, dear.  Now look, she’s approaching the duchess…

[Mrs. Higgins and the Professor continue to observe from the balcony.  As music continues to play and we have a sense of the passage of the evening, we hear the Westminster chimes toll 11:30 pm.  We see a spark of recognition and resignation in Eliza’s face.  She looks for and finds Colonel Pickering and after a brief exchange, takes his arm and ascends the stairwell stage left.]

MRS. HIGGINS.  Leaving so soon, Miss Doolittle.  I believe you have them eating out of the palm of your hand.

LIZA.  Yes.  Thank you.  I believe I could continue dancing well on into morning, but I feel I should return home.

PICKERING.  I tried to convince her to stay and enjoy herself, but she insisted.

LIZA.  It has been a wonderful evening, but I should be home before my fairy godmother returns.

HIGGINS.  Fairy godmother, what on earth are you…

MRS. HIGGINS.  It’s nothing dear.  Why don’t you take Miss Doolittle on home?  I’ll expect to hear from you in the morning.   And Miss Doolittle [almost an aside] … you were marvelous.

Eliza silently nods demurely in recognition.

HIGGINS.  If you insist.  Good night mother.

MRS. HIGGINS.  Good night, Henry.

PICKERING.  A pleasure as always, Mrs. Higgins.

HIGGINS, PICKERING, and LIZA all gather to leave.

LIZA.  [as they exit] It really was a wonderful dream.

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*Thou Fair Eliza, (c) Keeler, 2018

Thou Fair Eliza (c) - Act 2, Scene 1 Insert

With the copyright secured, and with the play not being produced this season, I'd like to take a couple of days to share a couple of my favorite inserts and revisions from the reworking of Pygmalion into Thou Fair Eliza*.

The first piece I'd like to share is an insert of a beat into scene 1 of Act 2.  The goal was to provide a greater insight into Eliza's mindset in this introduction to the Professor's world.  The challenge was to make the insert appear seamless, blending with Shaw's text and not drawing attention to the new material.

To that end, I've included a bit of the lead in and followup that originated in Shaw's text, along with the new insert.

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MRS. PEARCE [patiently] I think you'd better let me speak to the girl properly in private. I don't know that I can take charge of her or consent to the arrangement at all. Of course I know you don't mean her any harm; but when you get what you call interested in people's accents, you never think or care what may happen to them or you. Come with me, Eliza.

HIGGINS. That's all right. Thank you, Mrs. Pearce. Bundle her off to the bath-room.

LIZA [rising reluctantly and suspiciously] You're a great bully, you are. I won't stay here if I don't like. I won't let nobody wallop me. I never asked to go to Bucknam Palace, I didn't. I was never in trouble with the police, not me.

MRS. PEARCE. Don't answer back, girl. You don't understand the gentleman. Come with me. [She leads the way to the door, and holds it open for Eliza].

LIZA [as she goes out] Well, what I say is right. I won't go near the king, not if I'm going to have my head cut off. If I'd known what I was letting myself in for, I wouldn't have come here. I always been a good girl; and I never offered to say a word to him; and I don't owe him nothing; and I don't care; and I won't be put upon; and I have my feelings the same as anyone else—

[Mrs. Pearce and Eliza exit into the hallway. Pickering comes from the hearth to the chair and sits astride it with his arms on the back.  Main action and focus will be on Mrs. Pearce and Eliza, with dialogue below.]

MRS. PEARCE.  This way girl.  Keep up.  And do stop fidgeting. 

LIZA. Ma’am…?

MRS. PEARCE. [Slightly exasperated] My name is Mrs. Pearce.  You can address me as such.

LIZA.  Yes’em.  Mrs. Pearce, can I ask you a question?

MRS. PEARCE.  Yes….

LIZA. What kind of man is the professor?

MRS. PEARCE. What?

LIZA. You called him wicked.  Is he?

MRS. PEARCE.  The professor is a gentleman, I can assure you that.  I know not what he intends for your future, but you can be assured that no harm will come to you in this house, under my watch.

LIZA.  And Colonel Pickering?

MRS. PEARCE. I do not know the Colonel well, but from what I can observe, he appears the perfect gentleman.

LIZA. And how does the professor treat you?

MRS. PEARCE. Dear girl, the professor gives me no more regard than the phonograph in his study.  So long as I function properly and keep the house in order, we get along fine.

LIZA. Oh…

MRS. PEARCE. It would serve you well to remember that.  And if you have any issues, bring them to me first.  Are we clear?

LIZA. Yes’em

MRS. PEARCE.  Good.  Come now.  You best not go back into that study until you are spotless.


[Focus shifts back to Higgins and Pickering in the study, as Mrs. Pearce ushers Eliza offstage.]


PICKERING. Excuse the straight question, Higgins. Are you a man of good character where women are concerned?

HIGGINS [moodily] Have you ever met a man of good character where women are concerned?

PICKERING. Yes: very frequently.

HIGGINS [dogmatically, lifting himself on his hands to the level of the piano, and sitting on it with a bounce] Well, I haven't. I find that the moment I let a woman make friends with me, she becomes jealous, exacting, suspicious, and a damned nuisance. [He sits down on the bench at the keyboard]. So here I am, a confirmed old bachelor, and likely to remain so.

PICKERING [rising and standing over him gravely] Come, Higgins!  You know what I mean. If I'm to be in this business I shall feel responsible for that girl. I hope it's understood that no advantage is to be taken of her position.

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Tomorrow, I plan to share my favorite scene and addition to the text.

* Thou Fair Eliza, (c) Keeler, 2018.